Friday, 11 March 2011


Hello, God.

You know we agreed that I was going to find things to be joyful about instead of just going on all the time about things that are difficult or troublesome or hard work?  Do you remember the conversation we had not so long ago about how I wanted to be more upbeat, celebrate more, to actually look about to find things to celebrate, not just wait until they fall into my lap with a label on which makes it impossible to miss?

To be positive instead of negative?  To dwell on the good and not the bad? 

Well, we're about to open a bottle of champagne. We had one, sitting on the wine rack and gathering dust while we looked out for a reason to open it, and we've found one.

This week has been so grim in so many ways that Bryan and I are celebrating making it to the end of it. 

To recap:

Monday:  After a pretty duff day in general and a nightmare bedtime with my two small girls which involved much shouting and whinging, the evening saw me stab something sharp in my left eye and sit whimpering in A&E for an interminable period.  

Tuesday:  Was the day that I spent moping about with one eye shut and a dreadful headache feeling terrible and missing things I liked, discovering a damp patch on the newly plastered wall behind the TV and breaking my favourite mug.  Gave up Facebook for Lent with pretty bad grace.

Wednesday: This was the day where I was particularly sorry for myself and didn't manage to get to any of the things I had planned. Spilled a cup of coffee in bedside table drawer. Shouted at the children. Missed Facebook.

Thursday: Oh yes.  Thursday was a corker of a day where I had to go to the GP who told me I was generally a bit of a wreck and prescribed more antibiotics, I had to spend time at the dental hospital (ok, that was a good outcome but visits to the dental hospital generally don't rate highly on my list of things to do on a Good Day so I feel I can include it in this list of woes), then I felt awful by 6pm and missed my lovely singing group. Cross and self pitying. And missing Facebook.

Friday:  A day full of cancelled nice things and uncancellable stressful things. Shouted at the children a lot. Forgot I'd made an appointment to have my hair cut and remembered too late, developed an annoying computer problem that means I've lost two days email.  Cleaned the house from top to bottom, did a supermarket shop and now feel as if I've run a marathon. 

(I know, I know, that was pretty negative, but I thought it necessary in the set the scene, as it were.  I am moving on, honestly).

So, I am going to grab joy where I find it and tonight I intend to find it with my feet up on the sofa in front of a film with my husband and a glass of something nice.  

Thankyou for bringing me safeish through another week.  As they say, coulda been worse.

Thankyou that we are all here to celebrate the end of it, and raise a glass to whatever next week holds. (Please do you think you could possibly make it a bit less traumatic than this last week, please, if you don't mind too much?).

Thankyou that not for one minute while I was grumping about and bemoaning my lot - which, let's face it, isn't that bad - did you stop loving me, even at my most self-pitying and unloveable. Thankyou that Bryan's home safely, the children are (almost) in bed and my glass is waiting to be filled.

Thankyou that my eye is nearly better and that I was able to go to a doctor with my many and varied ailments and he can treat them and make me better. Thankyou that the TV is in the way of the damp patch which means I can't see it from the sofa, and my particular strain of antibiotics don't interact with alcohol.

Thankyou that my Mum has looked after me this week and thankyou that she's having an early night and a rest tonight after doing so much this week. Thankyou for my friends and church family who have cared about me.  Thankyou that we have food in the fridge and a warm house and that I have my Mum and my husband and my daughters all safe and close by.  

Thankyou that you sent your son to save me, and that there's nothing I can go through in this life that you won't be going through with me.  

Thankyou that I've made it to Friday night, and tomorrow is the weekend. 


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